Is it hard to achieve something? Or its easier compare to the effort you have to give to keep it after achieving! There are things I regret very much which I easily achieved but was not able to keep it. I am not very proud of everything I did with my life. But when I look back to my past, and sometimes regret for not doing the things I should have done I realize that, this is how you grow. You can’t expect to be perfect. Life gives you chances, you make mistakes, loose the chance, and learn from it, and you get the chance again and you keep loosing unless you get the real lesson to implement the right decision during the practical moment!
The older I am getting the more I am realizing these subtle detail notions of life. I used to think, I am quite intelligent and I know a lot, but trust me, unless you really go through the practical challenges you face, you can barely know how it works! Its like you know the theory that you should be calm before you go to a speech or a presentation, and there are many ways to make yourself strong enough to face it, but when it is the time, you are infront of bunch of people, standing to give the best shot, all theories are gone, and you face the hard truth….the practical part isn’t that straight forward 🙂
With time, you will notice that half of the thing you cried over last few years, never meant anything to anyone, not even to you. There are things I never noticed but now I do, and I realize how important they were, how valuable they were to me, and to my family and friends.
Sometimes I feel, if I could just start over, and then smile, I might make it even worse if I were to start again. Its better this way, I grow through practical lesson, through understanding myself and my surroundings more. And I hope and wish to grow more. I want to reach a point where I can look back and smile and say to myself that: I tried my best, I gave my best shots and can die in peace 🙂